June 2017 – The Big Words Blog Site

Kaep steps away: discussions on Colin Kaepernick’s early retirement from the NFL

While the main areas of my blog are Education, STEM and Financial Literacy, I will occasionally comment on Social and Political topics where I see it appropriate – especially when they relate to principles of my blog – in this case critical thought, and empowering others. This particular topic has the potential to get people fired up due its polarizing nature but I’ve decided to reach my hand into the fire nonetheless. In writing this I’m not seeking to give an opinion that everyone should follow – just to capture the main points and questions from the discussions that have ensued. I have to give credit where it is due in that I decided to write something about this after listening to the YouTube channels of Minister Jap, and Oshay Duke Jackson who weighed in heavily on this – both receiving agreement and backlash from their listeners.

A very recent and interesting story is former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick’s retirement. I won’t go far into who Colin Kaepernick is as his background is available online via a simple Google search. The entire timeline surrounding his retirement is actually captured in an article written by Dan Wetzel of Yahoo Sports titled, “Colin Kaepernick is making his choice: Activism over the NFL”. It was graciously shared by a Facebook friend.

Put simply Colin Kaepernick was a very electric player in the NFL at the quarterback position who had about three great years with the San Francisco 49ers before his career bottomed out into mediocrity. With his combination of size, quickness, mobility and a strong arm, the tattooed signal caller looked like the future of his position. With his good looks and a unique image/persona, he was also destined to clean up money-wise on endorsements, modeling and in the media off the field.

His ascension sputtered though when his brilliance on the field seemed to stagnate and regress which for me was surprising. His decline was mostly due to defenses adapting to his skill set which hadn’t yet evolved to make him more of pocket passer. The departure of Head Coach Jim Harbaugh back to my alma mater also didn’t help, nor did the dismantling of the roster that surrounded him when the 49ers made their run to Super Bowl XLVII. All in all, in the last year or so, even though he signed a $126 million-dollar contract, it wasn’t clear if he still had the skills to play in the league.

As all of the police shootings of black men were caught on tape within the last two to three years (Philando Castile, Alton Sterling, and Walter Scott for example), Kaepernick’s focus seemed to shift from returning to the All-Pro quarterback he had been, to becoming more of a vocal “Social Justice Warrior” championing the causes of police-brutalized African Americans who seemed to be victimized more and more. During the 2016 season, he made the bold protest at the beginning of 49ers’ games at first sitting during our national anthem, and then later on opting to famously take a knee. The reactions to his protests were mixed everywhere. In the league, some players and teammates disagreed with the protest, while others supported him and joined in. Kaepernick further did other things like vocally showing little confidence in our voting/electoral process which makes me wonder in hindsight if his example impacted the 2016 Presidential Election. Many people actually do follow the examples and leadership of celebrities/pro-athletes, and a low voter turnout on the Democratic side was actually said to have helped Donald Trump win the presidency. In another instance Kaepernick took it a step further by wearing socks to practice depicting the police as pigs – perhaps inspired the “Pigs in blanket: fry em like bacon,” chant by Black Lives Matter in Minnesota in 2015.

In my circle of friends, the question came up as to whether or not Kaepernick should’ve been focusing strictly on football and getting back to where he was a couple of seasons ago. It came up a lot actually. The other question was whether or not he was being a distraction to his team and organization, and if he was permanently burning his bridges in the NFL – a traditionally conservative organization which didn’t like controversies and always sought to, “Protect the shield,” as talk show host Jim Rome always says.

In Black America, points of view varied as they normally do with all things political and socioeconomic. The Pro-Black Activists and the “Stay Woke” folks vocally and fervently supported Kaepernick. Others questioned his motives and newfound interest in Civil Rights issues – particularly because he was bi-racial, raised in a white family and never openly took an interest in such issues before – black on black crime for example which some would argue is responsible for more black deaths. As a result of his protest, many also rallied behind the uncovered origins of the Star-Spangled Banner and rejected our national anthem. Something I interestingly missed but that a mentor pointed out, was that our traditionally liberal US Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader-Ginsburg even disapproved of Kaepernick’s protest which was surprising.

But what would be the outcome of Kaepernick’s protests? What good would come of them? He may have been, “Following is heart,” as said by a cousin on Facebook, but were his actions the best thing for him and the people he was looking to help? Some felt that Kaepernick had “won” because he had gotten people talking about him and his protests. Whether or not they would affect real change remained to be seen.

Fast forward to this summer of 2017 – Kaepernick, now a free agent had one tryout with the Seattle Seahawks who ultimately didn’t sign him leading to his retirement announcement. I heard about his retirement on the above mentioned shows where the discussions got very heated. Some of Minister Jap’s listeners for example called him all kinds of names like, “Klansman”, in addition to today’s en vogue black on black slur, “Coon”. The comments in both shows were surprisingly split down the middle in rebuke of Kaepernick vs. rebuking the hosts.

Whatever happens to Colin Kaepernick, I hope that he lands on his feet somewhere and there is a happy ending to his story unlike what some others are predicting. A couple of points stand out to me from Kaepernick’s retirement and the discussions I’ve listened to surrounding it. They are:

For all the younger people witnessing this, think about the long-term effect on your life and job prospects when seeking to make political/social statements. Ask yourself if it is really worth it in the end? Is it the appropriate time? In other words there are consequences to our actions. My former stepfather once told me that a particular black activist back in Buffalo made quite a few blacks in the city “self-destruct” and self-sabotage their careers. In a way the title of the above mentioned Yahoo Sports article is deceptive in that it sounds as though Kaepernick is highly coveted and doesn’t want to play anymore, versus not being wanted by any of the NFL’s 32 franchises.
Change and power in the United States is economic and only minimally impacted by protests and marches. If Kaepernick will no longer command a million-dollar salary and endorsements in addition to his former platform, how will he now effect meaningful change for those he wants to help? One of the arguments on the above mentioned shows was that he could’ve used his salary to build businesses and employ other blacks to make real change – similar to Magic Johnson who has done quite well since his playing days.
Not all black people think alike on anything. Issues over politics and race divide and fragment the race a whole. The fallout and name calling whenever there are differences of opinion are always striking to me.
Lastly even in 2017, there is a genuine distrust of bi-racial blacks by other blacks – particularly those raised in predominantly white households, who then take pro-black stances when it appears to be convenient.

One of the talk show hosts stated that at some point reality will crash down hard on Colin Kaepernick – if and when his resources are depleted, he’ll be forgotten – similar to what happened to MC Hammer once all of his resources were spent. Likewise, the same people he is seeking to help will eventually turn their backs on him even after some of his gestures of generosity such as giving suits to felons. Again, my hope is that he has thought all of this out, and will have a productive life after football. For that stretch of two to three years, #7 was definitely a great one in my opinion.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you enjoyed this you, you might also enjoy:

• Are you Cooning? Thoughts on Black America’s new favorite racial slur, critical thought, and groupthink
• What are you doing with your tax cut? Thoughts on what can be done with heavier paychecks and paying less tax
• Challenging misconceptions and stereotypes in class, household income, wealth and privilege
• Challenging misconceptions and stereotypes in academic achievement
• The benefits and challenges of using articulate speech
• Who will benefit from Apple’s $350 billion investment?

If you’ve found value here and think it would benefit others, please share it and or leave a comment. To receive all of the most up to date content from the Big Words Blog Site, subscribe using the subscription box in the right hand column in this post and throughout the site. Lastly follow me on Twitter at @BWArePowerful, at the Big Words Blog Site Facebook page, and on Instagram at @anwaryusef76. While my main areas of focus are Education, STEM and Financial Literacy, there are other blogs/sites I endorse which can be found on that particular page of my site.

A review of All Eyez on Me

I was originally going to write my next movie review on Spider-Man: Homecoming, but All Eyez on Me came out of nowhere. I first saw the trailer a couple of weeks ago, when going to see Alien: Covenant. I saw the movie shortly after it was released, and subsequently felt compelled to write something about it.

All Eyez on Me starred Demetrius Shipp Jr. who played the late and legendary Hip Hop recording artist/actor Tupac Shakur. I immediately thought Shipp was a spitting image of Shakur when I first saw the trailer, and he didn’t disappoint in the film. Shipp masterfully captured Tupac not only in terms of looks, but also in terms of verbal and non-verbal communication, and even in the way Shakur bobbed around dancing in his music videos, and in the recording studios.

Similar to Straight Outta Compton, the movie tracked Shakur’s early life – going back to his pre-teen years starting with his mother’s membership in the Black Panther Party. It further showed his family’s move to Baltimore, and then his initial move to the west coast. It touched upon his friendship with Jada Pinkett-Smith – a source of controversy as Pinkett-Smith subsequently released a statement saying that the movie wasn’t entirely factual content-wise.

All Eyez on Me further chronicled Tupac’s ascension to stardom first in music and then on the movie screen in addition to the problems that riddled his life and career. Similar to many Hip Hop artists, his career was mired by money issues in addition to violence which ultimately ended his life in 1996 while signed with Suge Knight’s Death Row Records. Similar to most artistic geniuses, he was taken from the world early just as he was on the cusp of going to his next creative level and expanding into other areas; record label ownership and screenwriting projects similar to Ice Cube.

While my favorite all time Hip Hop group is Gang-Starr, my interest in Tupac changed over the years. I was very much a fan of Digital Underground as a young teen and didn’t know he was actually a part of that group until he released “Brenda’s Got a Baby” – a more socially conscious track than most of what the Underground had produced. I took a liking to his track “If My Homie Calls”, and even bought a copy of his record “Strictly 4 My NIGGAZ”. I followed him from a distance as he blew up in movies, and then started to hear about his run ins with the police, the rape charge which put him in jail, and finally when he got swept up into the center of the East Coast-West Coast Feud which arguably took down both him and the Notorious BIG.

Simply put, Tupac was genius. His music embodied the anti-police and black power themes of the Black Panther Party while at the same time telling the stories of young black men in the inner cities. He released conflicting tracks like: “I Get Around”, “Keep Ya Head Up”, and then “Dear Momma” – a source of jokes at the time. The track that really grabbed me though was the solemn and dark, “So Many Tears” which he released when he was in jail and reflecting on his life. He used a double in the video who wore his signature bandana and loose fitting clothing. My favorite track he created once he joined Death Row Records was “Gangsta Party” where he teamed up with Snoop Dogg.

In the mid-1990s as an undergraduate, I interestingly took a liking to Smooth Jazz. As a whole I pulled back from the Hip Hop scene. A bit of a bookworm at the time, I didn’t particularly understand Tupac’s glorification of the “THUG” lifestyle and what it represented though I still respected his articstic brilliance and felt the pain and loss of his death – still unsolved to this day similar to that of the Notorious BIG who was also murdered shortly afterwards.

I would recommend seeing All Eyez on Me. The movie embodied a couple of the principles of my blog; empowering others and teaching others how to succeed – sometimes by teaching what not to do. The movie showed the complexity of Tupac’s life, and similar to Straight Outta Compton, it showed the importance of choices, and being in control of one’s financial destiny – something many recording artists of that era grappled with. Also similar to Straight Outta Compton, if you listened to Hip Hop music in the early 1990s, you’ll find yourself singing along, nodding you’re head, and bouncing your arms up and down in the theater. You’ll also recognize signature scenes from movies like Juice, and Above the Rim which Tupac starred in. Hill Harper plays a prominent role in the film, interviewing Tupac from jail. Interestingly, the actor who played Notorious BIG (Jamal Woolard) in the movie Notorious, reprised his role in this film, though all new actors were used for the prominent members of Death Row Records. There was also a cameo by NFL wide receiver Desean Jackson.

If you’ve found value here and think it would benefit others, please share it and/or leave a comment. I’ve recently started a YouTube channel, so please visit me at Big Discussions76. To receive all the most up to date content from the Big Words Blog Site, subscribe using the subscription box in the right-hand column in this post and throughout the site, or add my RSS feed to your feedreader. You can follow me on the Big Words Blog Site Facebook page, and Twitter at @BWArePowerful. Lastly, you can follow me on Instagram at @anwaryusef76. While my main areas of focus are Education, STEM and Financial Literacy, there are other blogs/sites I endorse which can be found on that particular page of my site.

Father’s Day 2017: Reflections on some of Dad’s money and life lessons

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“You just did something I don’t like. You didn’t count your change. How do you know that the cashier gave you the correct change?”

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Last month I wrote a piece in celebration of Mother’s Day, so it’s only fitting that I write something in celebration of Father’s Day as well. The Mother’s Day post was about a specific piece of advice my mother gave me about my engagement and looming marriage a couple of years ago. As jokingly stated in that post, Dad didn’t give me much advice in that particular instance. He did give me lots of guidance throughout my life though. Over on my “Heroes and Quotes” page, his is the first quote which was some advice he gave me at a young age about how to succeed academically.

There was much more though, particularly in way of advice about money, women and other things – lots about money and women. He sometimes consciously taught me things, and some things I learned simply from observation. With two of the key principles of my blog being “Creating Ecosystems of Success”, and “Empowering Others”, I’m going to reflect on some of his money lessons and some of their deeper and associated life meanings/significances – some of which I had to question. As in most cases, I didn’t understand everything that was being said then as I do now.

As I go through some of this stuff, keep in mind that fathers are important – biological, step-, or mentors of all sorts. According to data from Kid’s Count in 2015, 66% of African American kids were raised by a single-parent while the national average was 35%. My parents divorced when I was three-years old and I thus grew up in a single-parent household for the majority of my childhood. While I’ve sometimes looked back and wondered what it would’ve been like to have my father in the house, the blessing was that while he wasn’t physically there, it was important for him to be as visible and accessible as possible.

“Always make sure your children know who you are.” He tried hard to keep up with the words of his own father who died during his teens. It sounds like a simple thing, but as I grew into adulthood myself, went through college and even started dating, I realized that not every father did this, especially in the black community. The results often times were catastrophic with long lasting ramifications, especially in dating or ‘pair-bonding’ – a separate topic all in itself.

* * *

“You just did something I don’t like. You didn’t count your change. How do you know that the cashier gave you the correct change?” I was an early teen when this discussion took place. I had just paid for something, took the change the cashier gave me and immediately stuffed it into my pocket. A stern man, his words, “You just did something I don’t like,” stopped me dead in my tracks. I didn’t think he was paying attention, but sure enough he was – in general Dad was always paying attention to the most minute details even when you thought he wasn’t. He also remembered things long after you forgot them and would bring them back up when you least expected it.

When I discovered what he was unhappy about, it made sense to me and I started counting my change. I even started calculating in my mind the change I was supposed to get back from cashiers before they gave it to me. The lesson here was to be careful with my money, and to trust no one. Years later he observed that I was in fact careful with my money. I told him that I had gotten the behavior from him. He replied saying something very profound, “Well son, when you have to make child support payments, you have to be very careful with your money.”

“You always keep your receipt because you never know when you’re going to have to return something.” I don’t know which came first, this lesson or the change counting lesson, but they weren’t far apart. His father had gotten on him about this when he was younger. He had allegedly gone into lower Manhattan to buy some underwear and returned home without the receipt resulting in his getting scolded.

“When you get paid, you want to account for all of your expenses.” This was an early lesson about budgeting. We didn’t sit down and do one right then and there, and I wouldn’t master it until at least ten years later, but I always remembered the discussion.

“You always pay yourself first.” This lesson came shortly after I started working, though again as a teen, I didn’t grasp the power of this advice until later. It had tremendous implications in one’s prime earning years where diligent individuals save for both emergencies and investments and build wealth while others spend all of their income.

“You don’t quit your job unless you have another one to go to.” Dad gave me this sage wisdom between my junior and senior years of high school after quitting my very first job at the Denny’s Restaurant, near the Buffalo airport. I lasted three months at that job which consisted of washing dishes, cleaning up the restaurant, and taking out the garbage. I didn’t last long enough to have to shovel snow in the winter. The place where I really wanted to work for my first job was McDonald’s. At the time it looked fun to me. I was happy to have an income, but after a while I grew tired of working at Denny’s – coming home sweaty, greasy, and exhausted. Without talking to anyone, I quit that job right there on the spot with no other job to go to. It was then that I came to the understanding that I had no more cash flow – a sign of immaturity. The only positive thing about that situation was that I was still in high school and wasn’t required to contribute to any of my mother’s household bills. Some adults quit their job without having a replacement and put themselves in a pickle; often burdening those around them.

“You always keep money in the bank because you never know when an emergency is going to arise.” There’s a very funny story behind this lesson and it involves a woman – something very dramatic and stressful according to Dad. For my own safety, I’ll just stick to the lesson. At an early age, Dad stressed the importance of having money in the bank due to unforeseen emergencies which inevitably happen to you, or to someone around you. In this particular quagmire he had gotten into, having some money in the bank helped him get out of it. He also regretted once not having $5,000 available for a mortgage down payment on a house he was renting.

“You can keep dating her if you want to. You might have to miss your electric bill.” This sobering advice came during my first year in graduate school in my mid-twenties. It was one of my first experiences learning something that Dad had talked about for most of my childhood – women and money. At least most of the ones we knew came with a price tag, and wanted to be wined and dined.

I had, unfortunately, taken a liking to someone whom I dated for one to two months who openly admitted she was needy, which I didn’t understand at the time as she had already started her own career. Inexperienced at dating, she grew frustrated with my meager finances and my lack of understanding of what was expected of me. Dad’s advice here, which came in a hurtful and mocking tone, was simply communicating that I needed to determine whether or not I could afford this particular female. I decided that I couldn’t.

It’s an important set of questions for all men to ask themselves when meeting a potential partner. Can I afford her? Does she line up with my priorities? Will she tank my finances? This was also one of the first times I could personally feel the pain, the scars, and the poor fortune my father experienced in the dating jungle after he and my mother split – as there was lots of despair, and little hope or encouragement in his words.

“When you have to make child support payments, it forces you to be very careful with your money.” I have to be very careful here as this is a sensitive topic, and my mother generally proof-reads my articles. Throughout my childhood, Dad sometimes lamented about making child support payments – not because he didn’t want to support his children, but because I think he had a hard time making ends meet on his own end. During my childhood, he eventually took a second job in the military to pay the bills. It’s a sensitive topic because while he felt maxed out, my mother felt as though he wasn’t doing enough. And I’ll stop there, but suffice it to say that in many instances men and women see money (and life) differently. In some instances, as the ones being asked to provide, it can seem like your best is never enough – a hard pill to swallow. He and I talked about this a lot as I got older and I started experiencing my own scrapes and bruises with the opposite sex.

“The bank is going to want to look at all of your bank statements when you apply for a mortgage, and $2,000 isn’t any money,” Dad scoffed at me, making me feel five feet tall. I was still living with the big guy during my Postdoctoral fellowship. I had started reading Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad Poor Dad series and had joined my local Real Estate Investment Club. I wanted to make an ambitious move and get my first investment property – a duplex which I would live in and eventually rent out for “Passive” income. I needed some help with the closing costs and associated expenses, so I asked him for a loan. It was one of the worst experiences of my life.

Instead of a nice teachable discussion about the ups, the downs, and the ins, and outs of trying such a thing – it turned into him putting me in a proverbial headlock. It dragged on for days and days as he mulled over it, and asked me random pointed questions about it – his analysis and communication styles. After a while I just wanted to drop the whole thing, and I concluded that I never wanted to be in a position to ask his help for anything money-related, though I did once more, and returned to the same conclusion.

In hindsight while it was smart to want to create a passive income stream, it wasn’t a good idea in that particular instance. I wasn’t going to stay in that area long-term, and I wasn’t experienced enough, and didn’t have enough money to manage a property from a long-distance. What was funny was that many people don’t even have $2,000 in the bank they can access quickly. That said, he was right in that it wasn’t a substantial amount of money. He was also right in that prior to qualifying you for a mortgage, the banks do want to know everything about your financial history.

Dad was also jaded in terms of being a landlord from a prior experience, as he once had a tenant in his lower unit – an older woman. According to him, he went downstairs to collect the rent one day, and the woman transformed into a malevolent, ominous, and demon-possessed state. It scared him at the time and forever soured him on being a landlord.

“I wouldn’t invest in the Stock Market if I were you.” This bit of advice was given to me in my 30s when I expressed that I wanted to buy some stock by the end of that particular year. Because of his own life experiences, Dad was averse to losing money. Coincidentally, one of our closest cousins recommended I get in the game and buy stock, and even today experts like Dr. Boyce Watkins, strongly advocate blacks getting into the Stock Market. So who was right in this case? Who was to be believed and trusted?

This gets back to one of the points I made in my 2017 Mother’s Day post. As we grow into adulthood, I think we all get to a point where everything our parents tell us can’t be taken as the gospel and in some instances must be questioned and or pondered critically. In this particular instance, yes investing in stocks does involve potential loss. An important consideration going in though is whether or not you understand that there is a potential for the loss, and whether or not you can absorb the loss. In other words, do you have emergency money in the bank, and is the amount to be invested allocated for that reason? Can it be easily replaced for another round? This is a much different thought process than simply stating, “You’re going to lose your money if you do that.”

* * *

If the tone of this blog post was in part melancholy and mixed, then it reflects our father-son relationship which has been full of contradictions and mystery. When I look back at my youth many of my childhood experiences were marked by concerns over money. I’m not saying that I grew up in poverty because I didn’t by any means. I don’t really remember my mother, whom I spent the majority of my childhood with, talking about money a lot, but I think she shielded my brother and me from some things – sheltering us, as one of my aunts often said. I did look around at peers, such as my best friend and realized that I didn’t have Air Jordans, Starter Jackets, Karl Kani, or any of the trendiest apparel of our cohort.

Most of the money-related talks as I grew up actually came from my father and as you might have gathered from this post, many of them had some sort of pain associated with them. As I’ve gotten older, I understand things much better now. As we get older we start to see that our parents are people who make mistakes themselves, and are not perfect though at one point we may have thought they were. In some instances we start to understand their pains and struggles.

Over the years our father-son relationship has gone through a lot of changes – some good and some bad with multiple ups and downs. Overall I’m grateful for everything my father has done for me, and I tell him that every time I see him now (my mother too). That said, as I think President Obama said years ago, for children whose biological fathers are missing, there can be other fathers too. And even if a child’s father isn’t a good one, or can’t supply everything needed, there can again be other fathers to fill in those gaps. I certainly have many.

There are a lot of podcasts and men’s stations on places like YouTube these days – many talking about the importance of fathers. My favorite in this current station of my life is Paul Elam’s “A Voice for Men” – content I would recommend for any man still figuring things out in our society – personal values, dating and marriage, and finally gender/societal roles. Fathers are very important if for no other reason than to lend a balanced perspective on the world. This is true for both boys and girls who themselves will eventually both grow into men and women.

Thank you for taking the time out to read this blog post. If you enjoyed this post, you might also enjoy:

• Two well-behaved boys left to figure things out on their own: Reflections on growing up ‘Blue Pill’
• Mother’s Day 2018: Memories of my grandmothers
• Mother’s Day 2017: One of my mother’s greatest gifts, getting engaged, and avoiding my own personal fiscal cliff
• Challenging stereotypes and misconceptions in academic achievement
• The benefits and challenges of using articulate speech

The Big Words LLC Newsletter

For the next phase of my writing journey, I’m starting a monthly newsletter for my writing and video content creation company, the Big Words LLC. In it, I plan to share inspirational words, pieces from this blog and my first blog, and select videos from my four YouTube channels. Finally, I will share updates for my book project The Engineers: A Western New York Basketball Story. Your personal information and privacy will be protected. Click this link and register using the sign-up button at the bottom of the announcement. If there is some issue signing up using the link provided, you can also email me at bwllcnl@gmail.com . Best Regards.

Simone Griffin of HomeFree-USA discusses homeownership and the African American community part three

This is the conclusion of my interview of Simone Griffin of HomeFree-USA regarding Homeownership and the African American Community. In part two of our discussion, we talked about some of the impediments of Black homeownership, some things our youth can start learning at an early age regarding financial literacy, and finally, the effect of the housing market boom and crash on African American wealth. In part three of our discussion, we talked about Reverse Mortgages, and general recommendations and considerations for first time African American homebuyers. This entire interview addresses all of the principles of my blog recently added to the site.

Anwar Dunbar: What is a Reverse Mortgage and why are they bad products?

Simone Griffin: They aren’t necessarily bad. It is about the type of reverse mortgage you get and what you need it for. A Reverse Mortgage is for people 65 years and older who wish to borrow against the equity in their home. This is a loan which has to be repaid when the homeowner dies. The homeowner still has to maintain the property, and pay property taxes and homeowners insurance.

Reverse Mortgages can come with high fees, so they should really only be utilized if there are no heirs to the house, or if the homeowner truly has no other money to live on. Let’s say you own your home outright and have no other ways to pay your bills. If you get a reverse mortgage and there’s nobody who can step in and pay that loan off when you die, the only way to get it paid off is by selling the house. You’ve lost way more than you’ve gained. Your family and future generations have just lost a piece of property that they could have lived in.

Consider Brooklyn, NY, where the difference between the average income and the cost of a home is astronomical. Imagine a Black family who bought a home in the Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhood, who may have come in through the great migration from the south and bought a home in the 1960s or 1970s – now those Brownstones are going for well over a million dollars.

In 2010 Grandpa took out a reverse mortgage for $300,000, plus fees. He died last year, and now the family can’t come up with the amount owed to the bank, so the only thing they can do is sell the house. That’s a million-dollar house which they could never afford today, and $700,000 in equity has gone to the bank.

This is why we have to train our people in their working years about how to afford retirement. Aside for a reverse mortgage you can’t borrow for it. If you don’t have anyone to leave the home to and you need the money, then it’s fine. However, it should be a choice, not something you do because you didn’t plan well for retirement; especially if you have kids and grandkids who can utilize that property.

AD: Redlining. Are you seeing a lot of that in DC?

SG: After the housing, boom shady investors went door to door saying, ‘We want to buy your house. We’ll offer you $300,000 cash if you move tomorrow, and we’ll take care of all of the repairs.’ Except that the house is actually worth $500,000. When you’re paying cash for a house, an appraisal is not required. So people didn’t bother to spend the money on one, they just took the $300,000 and ran. If the homeowner had the property appraised, they could have sold it for a much higher amount. Or they could have kept it. Unfortunately, many of the same people in DC with parents or grandparents who purchased houses for $30,000 or $40,000 sold them at the wrong time. Now the neighborhoods are turning and they’re saying, ‘I want to move back,’ but they can no longer afford to.

AD: I used a first time homebuyer’s 3% down program with cash back at closing when I bought my condo. That came with several caveats and nuances that I didn’t understand – I just saw that it was 3% down with cash back at closing. I also bought into the sentiment that I was wasting money by renting and making someone else rich – a common motivation for first time homebuyers. What advice would you give first time African American home buyers who are looking to purchase a home? What things should they stay away from and what would you encourage?

SG: I would encourage them to stay away from Adjustable Rate Mortgages (ARMS) and creative financing. A 3% down payment is fine. Right now those the 3% down loans are often an FHA product, which means you have to pay Private Mortgage Insurance (PMI), around 1% of the total loan until you have about 20% equity. There are also 5% and 10% down products that don’t require PMI but the additional down payment may delay your purchase. Using an organization like HomeFree-USA will help you leverage the home buying opportunity since we’re familiar with many different products, as well as different loan officers.

Lenders are now starting to understand the drawbacks that requiring 20% down or PMI brings. As a result, more are offering lower down payment products. Our job at HomeFree-USA is to be aware of these products, and marry them with local, state and federal funds that will help decrease the cost of homeownership for the buyer. Now is a very good time to buy. But don’t fret if you can’t find a product right now – we know where they are.

If there is any way to pay down your debts as much as possible, you should do that. I know this is easier said than done, but if you can do it, it’s incredibly important to your peace of mind and for affordability. People get intimidated by their debt pay down process and what they have to sacrifice. They’ll say, ‘Well it’s two whole years,’ and then I flip it and I say, ‘It’s only two years.’ In the grand scheme of life, the money you can earn from saving or investing the money you’re paying in debt is substantial.

Let’s say you’re paying $200 in student loans every month, and you’re able to get that paid off in one or two years. If you put that $200 into a Mutual Fund, that money will grow over time. You’re paying interest while in debt, so it’s worth it to just drop out of life for two years, or however long it takes, and say, ‘I want this over. I’m paying off these debts and moving forward with life.’ Then you can take the money you’ve saved and use it towards a down payment on a house and avoid things like financing cars by paying cash.

People assume that they have to finance a car and that’s not the case. I’ve never financed a car. I only buy used cars, and each one is better than the last. But many Americans do not take the time to say, ‘I’m willing to put off something that I really want for the greater good (delaying gratification), so I don’t have to spend money financing a car.’ I recommended this to a friend. She didn’t do it and is still not at the level that she wants to be financially. I thought to myself, ‘If she’d taken the year I suggested to not have a car, her company would have paid for transportation to and from meetings, she could have walked, gotten rides, taken the Metro or Lyft, and after only a year would’ve been in a much better position in life.’

She lives in the center of the city. It’s an entirely different situation if you live in Odenton and have to drive to DC every day. But when you live in the city and work in the city, and the metro is only 10 minutes away, there is some leverage. It’s just a matter of being slightly inconvenienced for now in order to get to a greater position later (delayed gratification). And many Americans don’t feel comfortable doing that, but the problem is Black Americans have fewer options than non-Hispanic whites.

AD: That’s absolutely right. I personally have some higher financial goals and decided to get rid of my car for numerous reasons in 2012; living right next to the metro being one of the main ones. Some people just can’t fathom the idea of not owning a car. But I aspire to do things like growing my net worth, and attaining some assets (stocks and eventually real estate, for example).

SG: My father has a condo in the U Street Corridor. I was there this week helping him, and it’s very hard to find parking. The metro, and a bike stand, are both 2 blocks away. There are three grocery stores in the neighborhood and numerous restaurants. Why would you need a car if you lived there? If you live someplace that’s not far from the metro, why not take the opportunity do this for yourself so that you can eventually drive whatever you want? Like Dave Ramsey says, ‘We’re going to live like no one else, so later we can live like no one else.’ Take that opportunity now. But many people just don’t see it as an opportunity which is unfortunate, because where Black people are concerned, we don’t have as much to fall back on.

AD: That’s right. So a lot of this is in how you’re perceiving things, what you know, and what you’re willing to do.

SG: Exactly.

AD: Well, Simone, that was awesome. A lot of people are going to benefit from reading this. Do you have any parting comments or do you want to introduce HomeFree-USA one more time?

SG: To learn more about HomeFree-USA, go to www.homefreeusa.org. My financial blog is www.moneymagnet.homefreeusa.org. If they have any questions they can reach out to me at moneymagnet@homefreeusa.org. If your readers are ready to start the homeownership experience, they can contact us at 301-891-8400. They don’t have to talk to me for that.

We have a free class at our Riverdale, MD office every other Thursday, “Five Home Buying Secrets Everyone Ought to Know”. HomeFree-USA is judged by the number of successful and sustainable home owners we produce, not just the number of clients we see. That’s the key difference.

AD: Okay, well Simone, that’s all I’ve got. Once again thank you for this interview and for sharing your expertise and your experiences. If we can do a follow up piece in the future, that’s something I would be very interested in.

SG: Okay, thank you Anwar.

Thank you for taking the time to read this interview. If you enjoyed it, you might also enjoy:

• Simone Griffin of HomeFree-USA discusses homeownership and the African American community part one
• Simone Griffin of HomeFree-USA discusses homeownership and the African American community part two
• Your net worth, your gross salary and what they mean
• The difference between being cheap and frugal
• We should bought Facebook and Bitcoin stock: An investing story
• Challenging misconceptions and stereotypes in class, household income, wealth and privilege

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