A key focus of my blog is Health/Wellness. A key aspect of growing into a healthy man is a health father-son relationship. There certain keys to becoming a great father. The following contributed post is entitled, How To Build A Great Father-Son Connection.
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Raising children is one of the best and most rewarding jobs you’ll ever have in your life, but if can also be one of the most terrifying and confusing. You constantly doubt yourself and wonder if you’re messing them up at every turn, and although they say it gets easier as the years go on and you have more kids, it really doesn’t – it just becomes different.
Just as the relationship between a mother and daughter can often be a complex one, the relationship between a father and his son is equally complex. The main issues that men often face is that the way we’ve been brought up to view men is that they have to behave in a certain way – they’re not allowed to display emotion because it’s seen as weak, and although these paradigms are shifting within our society, it’s definitely taking a bit of time.
So, in this post we’re going to share with you some of our top tips for building a great father-son connection that will hopefully help you build an unshakeable bond with your son as he grows from a small child to a man you can be proud to say you raised.
Build mutual interests:
Whilst it’s important to let your son be his own person, as one of the foundations of building a connection with anyone lies in the commonalities you share, the same logic applies when building a connection with your son.
This isn’t to say you need to have every interest be the same – for example, he may like football and you prefer basketball, but then you can identify other areas where you share some common interests, such as fly fishing, so you can teach him how to fly fish, and even when he’s a child you can look for things that you may even want to develop as a common interest since often it’s the aspect of nostalgia that really creates an interest in the first place. If you’re worried that you and your son have no common interests, there’s likely going to be something – although it’s not impossible, it’s pretty rare for a parent and child to be real polar opposites in every area, and the funny thing about that is, even in cases where people think they’re polar opposites, they actually have so much in common but can’t actually see it because this commonalities in their personality, such as stubborness often causes a clash of personality.
Don’t wrap them in cotton wool:
It’s absolutely normal for a parent to want to protect their child at every turn, and we’re certainly not saying let them play with knives or go wandering away from home after dark – safety precautions should always be taken when it comes to your child and as the parent you get to say what boundaries you set around that because you do know best.
However, wrapping your son up in cotton wool and never doing things like playing rough or the typical things that fathers and sons do together and have done perfectly fine with for generations is something that could definitely cause problems for him later in life because he’ll be too afraid to do anything and could end up in some pretty dangerous situations if he doesn’t know how to take care of himself.
These things like wrestling with your son or even playing the occasional video game are great for bonding and as long as you’re keeping your communication open and letting him know that violence isn’t a solution to life’s problems, then you’re probably going to be doing just fine.
Make time for father-son activities:
As mentioned above, if you have some common interests that you and your son both enjoy, then why not take these to the next level and enjoy some father-son bonding time? Even if you haven’t yet established what your common interests are, then you can think of the things you enjoyed as a child, whether it was with your father or just with your friends. It can be things like playing football together, going to watch a game together, going hiking or camping, or even riding bikes or a hover board together. The point is, it’s really not so much about what you do, but more about the fact you’re doing it together and using that time to really focus on building your relationship and connection with your son.
Take on projects together:
Taking on projects with your son can, not only be a great way to bond and build your relationship, but it’s a great way to show him some responsibility, build his confidence and also be able to see that you trust him and believe in him enough to let him take on important tasks. Even just asking for his input in things like renovating the garage or fixing up your car will do wonders for his confidence and self-esteem, and although you may not notice the difference immediately, these are the things he’ll carry into his adult life and that will really have the biggest impact, so maybe start thinking about any projects you have or potentially could have that you could do together with your son.